Last Goodbyes
by Abi-miniSheelagh
Summary: After Des' arrest Shee says her last goodbyes. Bit unrealistic i know but ave a look anyways!
1. Default Chapter

Last Goodbyes  
  
Shee opened the door of Des' cell and walked in. He was sat there with his head in his hands. She went and sat down next to him, he knew someone was there but it just wasn't worth it to him to see who. "Des?" He looked up. He was amazed, he couldn't believe she would ever speak to him again after all the horrible things he'd done to her. "Shee I-" "Don't Des," Sheelagh cut him off. Silent tears fell down his face, as he knew no matter how he tried he couldn't make it up to her. Sheelagh was so confused. How could man she'd fallen so madly in love with hurt her like that? He was such a good man and she knew it, but the torment of his terrible mistake had turned him aroud. Taken him over to the dark side and changed him so drastically. She was still in love with her Des, she knew her Des was different, was sweet and caring and would never hurt her, not like that. "You've broken me Des. I'm torn, I loved you. I loved you so much and you caused me more hurt than I've ever known. You changed Des. Changed from the man I loved more than anything to the man I feared more than anything." Des knew all this was true. Words couldn't explain how much he regretted what he had done to Shee. He loved her so deeply and didn't know what had taken over him, if only he could go back. Go back and make it all better for her. But he couldn''t and that caused him so much pain. He too, was torn. "Shee, Im so sorry. Sorry for everything and I know that nothing I say can make it better but I need you to know how much I love you. I have no idea who I was or what I was doing the past few months, I was so hurt and confused. I'd lost you. I'd lost Niamh and I needed someone else to blame other than me. When I heard Cameron was there when my beautiful baby girl died, something just took over me. I was a different person." Shee was now crying too. She knew he meant what he was saying, but she could never forgive him for what he'd done. "Here Des, take this," she whispered as she handed him a picture of her and Niamh. "Just so you can remember us where ever you end up." "I'll never forget you Shee. I love you so much," he whispered through the tears. Sheelagh stood up, so did Des. Shee wrapped her arms around him one more time and held him tight. She let her tears fall onto his jumper. "Goodbye Des. I'll miss you." Des closed his eyes. "Goodbye, Shee. You'll always be my baby." Shee leant up and softly kissed Des on the cheek before letting him go and walking out of the cell. "I love you Sheelagh," Des called after her. She turned around and weakly smiled at him, then continued out of the cell leaving him still alone and still torn. He stared at the picture she had given him. He stared at the two most beautiful things in the universe and cried harder as he knew he'd never she them again. His gorgeous baby Niamh, he only wished he'd been there to hold her little hand and kiss her, his only daughter. The love of his life, Sheelagh who he'd caused so much pain, her loving blue eyes. You can see straight into her soul through those gorgeous eyes, he thought to himself.He turned over the picture and read the writing on the back.  
  
We will always love you Des.  
Shee & Niamh x x

__

__

_You say that im crazy_

_And its probably true_

_But im at my happiest_

_Just when im with you_

_Theres a distance between us_

_So far that i cant reach_

_The stagelights that shine so brightly_

_But still i find no peace_

_And im a long long way from you_

_Id give it all up just for you_

_Just to have you near me_

_Id give it all up just for you_

_Bring me up_

_Bring me down_

_Turn me inside out_

_Id give it all up just for you_

_Ive been hearing some stories_

_Of couples so in love_

_They spend so much time apart_

_That it never seems to work_

_And im a long long way from you_

_Still id give it all up just for you_

_Just to have you near me_

_Id give it all up just for you_

_Bring me up_

_Bring me down_

_Turn me inside out_

_Id give it all up just for you_

I know Shee aint that forgiving but hey it's fiction here! :)

Abi

P.S, the song wasnt written on the back but it wouldnt let me fix it so..yeah


	2. Total Eclipse Of The Heart

**Total Eclipse Of The Heart**

Des sat at a bench in his prison cell, 9 months after he last saw Sheelagh. He had hoped, and prayed for her to come and visit him. He had cried for her all night, every night, and most of the days too, unless he's got something else to think about. That's why he tried to keep himself occupied at all times but it was just no use. All that was ever in his head was Sheelagh, from the happier times they had spent together, laughing and loving, to the terrible times when he had taken her for granted, used her and hurt her. He couldn't stop the nightmares either. He kept having flashbacks in his sleep of that slap, he couldn't believe he had done that! He knew he wasn't that type of person, he knew he cared too much about Shee to ever want to hurt her, emotionally or physically. But he had, he'd slapped her one right round the face on that day, the worst day of his life. He really honestly wasn't himself that day. That day he was a kidnapper, woman abuser, hijacker and nearly, so nearly murderer.......but then again he was already a murderer. He sighed as he thought of this label. It wasn't really fair to call him that, he did kill 6 people but it's not like he meant to! "Bloody dodgy fifties," he muttered angrily to himself.

Sheelagh sat in her car, contemplating whether to go in and see him or not. It _was_ Christmas eve and she doubted anyone else would be going to see him. She had had a really hard time trying to get over him and get her head round everything that had happened, and to make it all worse there was her son's involvement in a crime, and his sexuality.....but this wasn't about Conor.

This was about her, it was about Des and seeing if he had really gone back to the way he was before. She decided just to do it before it was too late so she opened her door and got out of the car. She walked inside and approached the man behind the desk. "May I help you miss?" Shee gulped, "um...yes I'd err like to visit a prisoner please." The man smiled at her, "what's their name?" he asked. "Des Taviner."

The guy behind the desk raised his eyebrows and looked at her. Shee was feeling uncomfortable so she asked him what was wrong. "You wouldn't happen to be Sheelagh?" he enquired. "Yes...." she replied, surprised that this man, who she'd never met before knew her name. "Wow, this is great, he's gonna be so pleased! oh, sorry if im freakin ya out luv, Taviner n me are pretty good mates, he's a decent guy and ya dont come across many of them here!" he winked at Shee, who smiled in return. The guy took her through and asked her to sit down at one of the benches, then he went to get Des.

Des was still deep in thought, hoping that Shee was having a good Christmas, not thinking about him and the pain he'd caused her. There was a knock on the door which broke Des out of his thoughts, then the guy from the desk opened the door and smiled at Des. "Hows ya day been Des?" he asked cheerfully. "Crap Steve!" Des was obviously in one of his moods...not for long! Steve smiled cheekily, "got a surprise for ya Dessie!" Des looked up at him questioningly, "yeah?" Steve signelled for Des to follow him so he did. Steve escorted Des to the room where his 'surprise' was waiting and told him to shut his eyes. Then Steve left them on their own. Shee walked up to Des who still had his eyes shut and whispered, "I missed ya, couldn't keep away!" Des' eyes shot open and he grinned more than anyone ever has before! Then he shook his head and said, "I've had this dream before!" Shee laughed, yep this was definately her Des back! She wrapped her arms around him. "It aint a dream darlin! Happy Christmas Des," she said, making his grin grow even wider. "I can't believe you're here!" Shee rolled her eyes, "No neither can I!" Des looked into her eyes. "I love you Shee," he said quietly and slowly, not knowing what response to expect. Sheelagh saw the fear in his eyes, "I love you too." Des kissed her, so happy to be allowed to do that again.

_Every now and then I get a little bit lonely_

_And you're never comin round_

_Every now and then I get a little bit tired_

_Of listenin to the sound of my tears_

_Every now and then I get a little bit nervous_

_That the best of all the years have gone by_

_Every now and then I get a little bit terrified _

_But then I see the look in your eyes_

_Every now and then I fall apart_

_Every now and then I fall apart_

_Every now and then I get a little bit restless_

_And I dream of something wild_

_Every now and then I get a little bit helpless_

_And I'm lying like a child in your arms_

_Every now and then I get a little bit angry _

_And I know I've got to get out and cry_

_Every now and then I get a little bit terrified_

_But then I see the look in your eyes_

_Every now and then I fall apart_

_Every now and then I fall apart_

_And I need you now tonight_

_And I need you more than ever_

_And if you'll only hold me tight_

_We'll be holding on forever_

_And we'd only be making it right_

_Coz we'll never be wrong_

_Together we can make it to the end of the light_

_You're love is like a shadow_

_On me all of the time_

_I don't know what to do_

_And I'm always in the dark_

_Im living in a powder keg_

_And giving off sparks_

_I really need you tonight_

_Forever's gonna start tonight_

_Once apon a time I was falling in love_

_Now I'm only falling apart_

_There's nothing I can do_

_Total eclipse of the heart_

_Once apon a time there was light in my life_

_Now there's only love in the dark_

_There's nothing I can say _

_Total eclipse of the heart_


End file.
